WWE Superstars TV Report – 13th February 2014

Slow news week in WWE and this show is no different. They gave us the same Divas match as last week and used the same men’s singles match two nights running on Main Event and then here on Superstars. Not sure I’ve seen them ever do that before.

Byron Saxton seems to be being given a push; he’s now the regular colour announcer on this show and has appeared on Main Event as well as still being on NXT. Pretty sure it won’t last very long.

Natalya v Tamina Snuka

In a rematch from last week, Tamina Snuka takes control in the early going. It kind of feels like they’re trying to make Tamina into what Awesome Kong never got the time to be in this company. She’s tall but because she lacks skill, ring experience and ability, she’s not fooling anyone. Funniest spot here is after a really nice stiff running clothesline from Tamina, she boots Natty in the back a few times and then takes off her biker vest (a la Steve Austin c 1997) and throws it at her. Looked like the most whimpish, cowardly move.

Tamina’s offence is fairly limited. If you look at the up-and-comers like Summer Rae, they really have so much more to offer in the ring. Her move set is essentially, chops, punches, knees, a Samoan drop, a power slam and her father’s finisher. Case in point: Natalya hits two really neat suplexes that look great and is immediately just kicked in the face to ruin the flow of the match.

The finish has Tamina scream something inaudible at the crowd almost Vickie Guerrero-like as she goes for the Samoan drop. Natalya wriggles out and puts her in the Sharpshooter. Tamina taps out immediately. Awful way to book a monster heel.

Even Steven booking means Natalya gets her win back. If we get the same match next week, they need to improve on this for all our sakes.

Winner: Natalya via submission in 4:39.

On the Raw Rebound this week we get the 6-man tag between The Rhodes brothers & Rey and The Wyatts followed by The Real Americans v Sheamus & Christian. Cesaro was the star of Raw on Monday in my eyes.

They showed that tremendous Lita Hall of Fame video. In the light of this video package, never has the Divas division look so tame.

Big E comes out next, probably in his last ever appearance as ‘Big E Langston’. They actually cut the ‘Langston’ off from Justin Roberts’ ring announcement for him which just sounded really odd and was kind of unnecessary but there we go. His Titantron video still has a huge dumbbell with ‘Big E Langston’ written on it. Think they need to take that white belt off of him too.

Big E v Drew McIntyre (w/ Jinder Mahal)

This was a non-title match and the same match was also taped the following night at the SmackDown! tapings for Main Event. Technically, therefore, this match happened first but was shown second. Who cares, right? They were both non-title matches but, of the two, this was a better match that was given more time.

Without looking it up, guess when Drew McIntyre was IC champion? Four years ago, 2009. He beat John Morrison at TLC and had a little run as champion under that period where he was ‘the chosen one’. And look at him now. Drew’s a good worker, though. He’ll come again but they’ve buried him so far down this card in this comedy trio spot that there’s just no way he’ll ever get to that kind of level again. Typical WWE: too much, too fast, too soon.

Interesting that Heath Slater is not here again, I wonder if he’s OK – he was off for personal reasons before the New Year for some time. Mahal is in ring gear just in case we were wondering if he might try to get involved.

Early offence is all about Big E who catches Drew trying a cross-body and gets hit with multiple backbreakers and manages to kick out at two. Big E powers up and chain wrestles McIntyre and, just to prove how agile he is, Big E leapfrogs Drew out of an Irish whip is if he were a lithe 200lb-er. Langston hits a diving shoulder tackle reminiscent of the Ultimate Warrior, tries to put Drew into the Big Ending who fights out and rolls to Mahal outside the ring as we go to a commercial.

After the break, Big E hits a scary belly-to-belly suplex but McIntyre dodges a repeat attempt at a shoulder to his midsection and starts to get some moves in on Big E. Weirdly, probably ironically, we get duelling “Big E Langston-3MB!” chants as Drew locks in on Big E’s left arm. Drew gets in a near fall when he lands a drop kick on Langston he also does an impressive kip up but Big E finally gets the heat when he throws McIntryre off the second rope. He uses another belly-to-belly, a huge splash and after chasing off Mahal who has tried to interfere, he hits the Big Ending for the win.

Drew McIntyre v Big E is not a ppv quality match but Drew’s good enough to go 10-15 minutes with someone like Langston and, given time, would easily deliver a good match.

Winner:  Big E via pinfall (6:47)

The show finishes with the end of the main event Randy Orton v John Cena match from Monday. If that’s your sort of thing, I highly recommend it.

WWE Superstars TV Report – 6th February 2014

WWE took CM Punk off all their opening show titles this week and so they took the opportunity to update the Superstars opening. Batista is there, as are The Wyatts and Curtis Axel. The latter is the only one I’m likely to see wrestle on this show. Ever.

A-Ry’s still off this show; Byron Saxton seems to be a permanent fixture which, as discussed last week, is a huge downgrade in quality.

Natalya comes out. She looks great at the moment: she has new ring gear, looks very slim and comes out full of beans, high-fiving everyone. Unfortunately, I think she’s about to job to Tamina Snuka.

Natalya v Tamina Snuka

Tamina Snuka has been around since 2010. I’d say in the last 4 years she’s got marginally better but she still lacks fluidity in the ring. She wears this black waistcoat/vest like something Nash or Austin would have worn in the last 90s and looks like a biker’s girlfriend who is just wearing the threads to fit in.

Natty gets the best out of Tamina here. There’s quick, neat little roll ups and some nice mat chain wrestling that Tamina just about keeps up with but Natalya is really just playing puppeteer here. Somewhere early on Tamina cuts her elbow and is bleeding a little throughout the match. Tamina uses some really nice heel offence culminating in a Samoan Drop.

Tamina goes for the Superfly splash but clearly doesn’t commit to it and Natalya rolls out of the way. Snuka boots her between the middle and bottom rope and they brawl on the outside, using the announce desk. Natalya rolls her back in and gets the heat; she goes for the Sharpshooter, but Snuka gets to the ropes. Natalya ducks a superkick and gets two on a surprise cover, but Snuka jumps up off the mat and hits a superkick for the win.

Nice little opener. Really good to see these Divas matches improving in quality over the last few weeks. Natalya really is the one to get a good match out of newer talent; she’s such a safe pair of hands. That Hart dungeon certainly developed some protective workers.

Winner: Tamina via pinfall in 4:07.

On the Raw Rebound this week we get Randy’s opening promo on Raw where he didn’t dare pause for breath for the first two minutes in case people chanted for CM Punk. The cage match follows and, yes, Cody’s ridiculous moonsault gets yet more air time. What a complete waste of a spot on free television. I should note, though, Superstars always carries a ‘don’t try this advert’ every week during the show.

Los Matadores are out next sans El Torrito but are joined for 8-man tag action with The Usos who perform the Siva Tau. Usos were wearing black armbands, it’s not made clear why.

Curt Hawkins is still employed! I checked my notes and this is his first WWE TV appearance since October 4^th 2013. He’s out with 3MB and boy does he look tubby. Frankly, he looks out of shape. A shame because Curt is a decent worker.

Los Matadores & The Usos v 3MB & Curt Hawkins

This was all house show comedy from the get go. The announcers make out that this is some kind of initiation match for Curt Hawkins to try out for 3MB. Slater takes early offense, but gets sent to the outside as we go to a commercial. They do the spot where all four guys are outside the ring and Diego teases a dive through the ropes but stops short and all the guys cower and disperse out of fear.

After the break, Diego beats up Mahal, but a boot to the stomach and a blind tag from Slater puts Diego into the opposition corner. Jimmy Uso gets the hot tag from Diego and gets the heat on Hawkins. He hits his kick, a Samoan drop, his stink face alternative on Curt who kicks out of the cover and tags Slater in.

Hawkins shows that he’s more than capable in the ring here. He’s had an odd career to date in the WWE: he was a member of the Edge’s La Familia in Edge’s title runs in 2007, then he won the tag titles with Zack Ryder in 2008 but more lately he’d been tag teaming with Tyler Reks. When Reks left to be a Dad in 2012, Hawkins was back at the bottom of the deck again. Hunter quite likes Hawkins and used him to help get into ring shape for his match with Undertaker at WrestleMania 28.

There was a cool spot here where Jimmy goes to superkick Hawkins who is in front of Jey. Hawkins ducks, meaning that it looks like Jimmy will kick his brother but Jey catches his leg and then swings it back into Hawkins’ face.

The finish sees Slater use his ‘save’ to break up a cover between Jimmy and Curt. The ring fills and when it clears again, Jimmy suicide dives over the top rope on to 3MB outside. Inside the ring, Jey superkicks Hawkins, and The Usos hit Samoan Splash for the pin.

This felt a bit like they all felt that if they all turned up that it would just work and be OK. In reality, adding more men to this weekly Superstars match just made it slightly worse.

Winners:  Los Matadores & The Usos via pinfall (7:52)

The show finishes with the end of the fantastic Randy Orton v Daniel Bryan match from Monday which was one of the longest ever main events on Raw.

WWE Superstars TV Report – 30th January 2014

This week’s episode of WWE Superstars still had CM Punk in the titles – how long before he gets taken off the Raw intro? They’d unfollowed him on Twitter by Tuesday. Mind you, that was probably for fear of what he’d say and, yet, shockingly, he’s been on radio silence for the last 5 days…

Well, A-Ry was absent this week, so NXT’s Byron Saxton was on co-commentary with Tom Philips. Saxton is kind of jack of all trades, master of none in WWE. He commentates, ring announces, wrestles and manages. He’s decidedly average at all of them. His voice has that irritating cadence of someone who is doing an impression of a sports announcer but doesn’t have the natural tone to be one. I have to say, his being here made me realise that Alex Riley is infinitely better in this role.

Summer Rae v Natalya

As I’ve often said on these reports, I really like Summer Rae. She’s an excellent heel and has a pretty unique move set. Obviously, she looks great but I think is almost more impressive because she has the back story of just being Fandango’s dance partner/valet and so when she starts to wrestle well, it’s kind of ‘storyline’ impressive - if that makes sense.

Summer Rae lunges at Natalya immediately on the bell and pushes her. We’re reminded by Phillips that they’re on the upcoming Total Divas (presumably where they feud) and then Rae is taken down by a shoulder block. It’s the little details of her character that I like with Summer; when she hip tosses Natalya, she stops to take some time to do a few dance steps. She knows what she’s doing and gets ‘it’ – and is getting ‘it’ way quicker than most.

The story of the match is that Natalya wants things over quickly and so keeps trying to put Rae’s long legs into the Sharpshooter. They chain wrestle on the mat and as Natalya goes for the submission manoeuvre, Rae wriggles away and slides through the ropes before Natalya can get it locked on. Natalya throws Rae back into the ring, but gets stomped in the head when she tries to follow. Rae’s legs are ridiculous.

Rae works over Natty’s left arm and uses a really cool, unique submission hold on her arms using her legs. She locks them round behind Natayla’s head and is them able to roll her over to pin her shoulders to the mat. It’s fairly rare. She knocks Natalya down with a roundhouse kick and Natalya knocks Summer down with a pair of clotheslines and a suplex. She stomps on her head, and hits a fairly clean dropkick. Rae slips out of a bodyslam and she stops to slap Natalya. Obviously, a nice ring of boos hit the ring and Natty is angry and so slaps her down to the mat with a discuss clothesline. Finally, she locks on the Sharpshooter for the win.

Summer Rae isn’t the finished product by any means but if you look at what she does in the ring it is WAY more interesting and creative then most of the other Divas on the roster.

Winner: Natalya via pinfall in 4:07.

The Raw Rebound is next. They air an Elimination Chamber advert which shows a little girl playing with her dolls house which then cuts to Stephanie locking the door on the chamber, calling it ‘my play house’. We get the opening segment between Orton, Batitsta and Lesnar followed by the DQ finish in tag title match.

Los Matadores lighten the mood next. So, yeah, El Torrito entered the Rumble at number 20 for a comedy spot and eliminated Fandango. Poor guy. It really should have been Ryback to just to put the final nail in his coffin.

3MB come out next. One of these weeks I’m going to stop moaning about this but why do they go with Jinder over Heath? I’m so sick of watching this guy. He appears not to get any better. It’s also the 3^rd or 4^th time that they’ve had this match on Superstars in the last few months. I think I’d better get used to it.

Los Matadores (w/El Torrito) v 3MB (w/ Heath Slater)

Mahal and Diego start things off. Diego starts out with a spell, dominating Jinder. Fernando tags in to continue the attack. Mahal is able to get to the corner and Drew tags in but makes little impresion. Jinder and McIntyre go outside and to regroup as they do every single match. Los Matadores pretend to go for a double tope but stop at the ropes, they all cower, everyone laughs and we go to a break.

This is good house show fun and the action is quick and slick, especially from Los Matadores. The commentators aren’t interested; I guess Phillips sees this, like me, every week now. We’re told about the ‘biggest story in WWE, right now” and my ears prick up. CM Punk leaving, right? Nope. Daniel Bryan not winning the Rumble? Nah. Fans hijacking the end of the Rumble and booing Rey? Wrong! Of course, the biggest story in the WWE right now is… Batista winning the Royal Rumble. Huh. I would beg to differ.

Fernando gets doubled teamed by Jinder and Drew out of the break. Los Matadores are masters of being in peril and Fernando musters some pace, coming tantalisingly close to making a tag. Finally, after tons of heel beat-downs from 3MB, Fernando gets to his corner. Diego gets the heat and takes out Mahal quickly. Mahal is down and Diego goes to the top but takes out Drew, who is outside, instead. Heath distracts Diego, so El Torito that can take him out with a tilt-a-whirl headscissors. The finish sees Jinder taking the simultaneous kick to the head and leg sweep from Los Matadores which is enough to take him out for the pin.

Fun match as always but they’re practically working to a tried and tested script. There are plenty of tag teams for them to go up against. The bookers need to change it up a little. Please, no more Jinder Mahal for a few weeks.

Winners:  Los Matadores via pinfall (8:12)

The show finishes with the end of the Cena, Sheamus & Bryan v The Shield match from Monday which was excellent.

James Cox | @wweukblog

Royal Rumble 2014 Predictions

WWE Royal Rumble 2014 Predictions

Cody Rhodes & Goldust (c) v The New Age Outlaws

So, for the last few years they’ve tried to create a tag team division worthy of caring about. In the last 12 months it has exploded and we’ve had a great pair of tag champions for the last six months. Why on earth the New Age Outlaws are now in this programme and, more worryingly, strong favourites to win the titles is utterly baffling. There must be at least five tag teams who could have been put in this position but instead they’ve gone with some old timers who have come back into consciousness over the last couple of years.

It’s too soon for a split between the Rhodes’ brothers but if they do it and they go with that match at Mania, I’ll certainly enjoy it. I think they should delay it, however, until SummerSlam perhaps. So, despite the stupidity of it all, I’ll go with the bookmakers and say that the Rhodes’ lose here.

Winners: The New Age Outlaws

Daniel Bryan v Bray Wyatt

Bray is yet to live up to his promise in the ring. His promos have been enthralling at times. The one he cut this week on Raw on Bryan was astonishing; in fact, I was shocked at how little coverage it got. His voice is perfect. He has a southern drawl, a charisma worthy of Max Cady from Cape Fear and delivers complex dialogue beautifully. In the ring, though, he’s yet to be anywhere near as good. Even with Bryan, I don’t see this as being particularly good.

Bryan ought to win but I think Bray wins after interference from the Wyatts. It will probably run fairly short and it will disappoint the fans but they might just get a pay off later…

Winner: Bray Wyatt

Big Show v Brock Lesnar

My god what a waste of everyone’s time this one is. Lesnar is one of the most, if not the most, fantastic performers that they have at the moment. If you watch his matches since his return, they’ve been tremendous: Cena at Extreme Rules 2012 was just excellent; the Triple H matches were great, particularly the first; the Punk match was a joy. So why the fuck are they wasting their time with this pile of shit? Lesnar running away from Big Show? It’s a booking nonsense.

Lesnar will get thrown around, sell to Show’s stupid moves and take silly bumps that he shouldn’t while Show does his tough face that nobody buys. All of this is so hateful and it makes me incredibly angry. Lesnar should not be facing Big Show in 2014. Just think about that for a moment; Brock Lesnar v The Big Show in 2014. Seriously. Lesnar should be facing Orton, Batista, Cena, Bryan, Punk or even Langston or Reigns.

Or course Lesnar wins. F-5 in the middle of the ring for a huge pop. Lesnar and Undertaker at WrestleMania 30 will be one that is played again and again. In a word: huge.

Winner: Brock Lesnar

Randy Orton (c) v John Cena

I hope that this is better than their last match. It certainly ought to be and I think it will be. The angle with Cena’s dad injected some much needed personal heat into this match. Before it, Orton’s complaints were with The Authority and not his opponent. Orton, as hot favourite, is a poor champion and a feud with Batista for the title at Mania is hardly exciting.

If they go with Orton, I hope he drops it at the Chamber to Cena so that we get a non-title match between Orton and Batista at Mania and, instead, Cena and Bryan for the title. I don’t think they’re interested in that happening, though, even though that would be the perfect way to end that year long storyline for Daniel Bryan.

Orton wins here. It won’t be clean because they neuter him on a weekly basis and they need to keep Cena strong. He keeps the title through til WrestleMania. It blows off the feud and Cena moves on to a new programme. I don’t see Bray (the current plan) as that programme but we shall see…

Winner: Randy Orton

Royal Rumble Match

Unless Bryan enters and they go with him and Cena at WrestleMania which I think would do stellar business and would satisfy me hugely, then there are few who can win this. Batista and Orton is a lock for Mania so, unless they want to do a swerve, it could be Batista here. Punk has an outside chance; beyond that I don’t see there being many realistic options, though I’m happy to be surprised.

I’m looking forward to seeing several things here and I hope they deliver: Punk going 50-60 minutes could be one for the ages. He’s one the safest hands in the roster right now and certainly the ring general of the names who are officially entered at time of press. Kofi’s annual spot is also one to look out for; if he tops the chair-hopping from last year, it will take some creative genius. There will be a few surprise entrants and the buzz surrounding those is always tremendous fun. Suspects include: Sheamus, Christian, Evan Borne, Jimmy Wang Yang, Jericho, RVD, Kevin Nash, Sean Waltman, John Morrison, Hogan, Warrior, Jake Roberts, Undertaker and Triple H among others.

Roman Reigns is the favourite with the odds-makers to be the man to eliminate the most this year on his way to becoming a genuine player. Punk will come close, Langston should run riot for a while, Batista may even equal or better those if he wins.

Winner: Daniel Bryan