Royal Rumble 2014 Predictions

WWE Royal Rumble 2014 Predictions

Cody Rhodes & Goldust (c) v The New Age Outlaws

So, for the last few years they’ve tried to create a tag team division worthy of caring about. In the last 12 months it has exploded and we’ve had a great pair of tag champions for the last six months. Why on earth the New Age Outlaws are now in this programme and, more worryingly, strong favourites to win the titles is utterly baffling. There must be at least five tag teams who could have been put in this position but instead they’ve gone with some old timers who have come back into consciousness over the last couple of years.

It’s too soon for a split between the Rhodes’ brothers but if they do it and they go with that match at Mania, I’ll certainly enjoy it. I think they should delay it, however, until SummerSlam perhaps. So, despite the stupidity of it all, I’ll go with the bookmakers and say that the Rhodes’ lose here.

Winners: The New Age Outlaws

Daniel Bryan v Bray Wyatt

Bray is yet to live up to his promise in the ring. His promos have been enthralling at times. The one he cut this week on Raw on Bryan was astonishing; in fact, I was shocked at how little coverage it got. His voice is perfect. He has a southern drawl, a charisma worthy of Max Cady from Cape Fear and delivers complex dialogue beautifully. In the ring, though, he’s yet to be anywhere near as good. Even with Bryan, I don’t see this as being particularly good.

Bryan ought to win but I think Bray wins after interference from the Wyatts. It will probably run fairly short and it will disappoint the fans but they might just get a pay off later…

Winner: Bray Wyatt

Big Show v Brock Lesnar

My god what a waste of everyone’s time this one is. Lesnar is one of the most, if not the most, fantastic performers that they have at the moment. If you watch his matches since his return, they’ve been tremendous: Cena at Extreme Rules 2012 was just excellent; the Triple H matches were great, particularly the first; the Punk match was a joy. So why the fuck are they wasting their time with this pile of shit? Lesnar running away from Big Show? It’s a booking nonsense.

Lesnar will get thrown around, sell to Show’s stupid moves and take silly bumps that he shouldn’t while Show does his tough face that nobody buys. All of this is so hateful and it makes me incredibly angry. Lesnar should not be facing Big Show in 2014. Just think about that for a moment; Brock Lesnar v The Big Show in 2014. Seriously. Lesnar should be facing Orton, Batista, Cena, Bryan, Punk or even Langston or Reigns.

Or course Lesnar wins. F-5 in the middle of the ring for a huge pop. Lesnar and Undertaker at WrestleMania 30 will be one that is played again and again. In a word: huge.

Winner: Brock Lesnar

Randy Orton (c) v John Cena

I hope that this is better than their last match. It certainly ought to be and I think it will be. The angle with Cena’s dad injected some much needed personal heat into this match. Before it, Orton’s complaints were with The Authority and not his opponent. Orton, as hot favourite, is a poor champion and a feud with Batista for the title at Mania is hardly exciting.

If they go with Orton, I hope he drops it at the Chamber to Cena so that we get a non-title match between Orton and Batista at Mania and, instead, Cena and Bryan for the title. I don’t think they’re interested in that happening, though, even though that would be the perfect way to end that year long storyline for Daniel Bryan.

Orton wins here. It won’t be clean because they neuter him on a weekly basis and they need to keep Cena strong. He keeps the title through til WrestleMania. It blows off the feud and Cena moves on to a new programme. I don’t see Bray (the current plan) as that programme but we shall see…

Winner: Randy Orton

Royal Rumble Match

Unless Bryan enters and they go with him and Cena at WrestleMania which I think would do stellar business and would satisfy me hugely, then there are few who can win this. Batista and Orton is a lock for Mania so, unless they want to do a swerve, it could be Batista here. Punk has an outside chance; beyond that I don’t see there being many realistic options, though I’m happy to be surprised.

I’m looking forward to seeing several things here and I hope they deliver: Punk going 50-60 minutes could be one for the ages. He’s one the safest hands in the roster right now and certainly the ring general of the names who are officially entered at time of press. Kofi’s annual spot is also one to look out for; if he tops the chair-hopping from last year, it will take some creative genius. There will be a few surprise entrants and the buzz surrounding those is always tremendous fun. Suspects include: Sheamus, Christian, Evan Borne, Jimmy Wang Yang, Jericho, RVD, Kevin Nash, Sean Waltman, John Morrison, Hogan, Warrior, Jake Roberts, Undertaker and Triple H among others.

Roman Reigns is the favourite with the odds-makers to be the man to eliminate the most this year on his way to becoming a genuine player. Punk will come close, Langston should run riot for a while, Batista may even equal or better those if he wins.

Winner: Daniel Bryan